As the nation looked upon the courage of Missouri football player Michael Sam for coming out as a gay man, I couldn’t get the phrase “Michael Sam-I-Am” out of my head. This little take on Dr. Seuss’ “Green Eggs and Ham” is for all the gay athletes out there — past, present, and yet to […]

As the nation looked upon the courage of Missouri football player Michael Sam for coming out as a gay man, I couldn’t get the phrase “Michael Sam-I-Am” out of my head. This little take on Dr. Seuss’ “Green Eggs and Ham” is for all the gay athletes out there — past, present, and yet to come. I hope you’ll take it in the spirit in which it’s meant — with great admiration for having the courage to be the person God called you to be.

Gay Guys Named Sam
(Green Eggs and Ham)

I am Sam. Michael Sam-I-am.

That Michael Sam! That Michael Sam! I do not like that Michael Sam!

You do not like gay guys named Sam?

I do not like them, Michael Sam.
I do not like gay guys named Sam.

Would you like them here or there?

I would not like them here or there.
I would not like them anywhere.
I do not like gay guys named Sam. I do not like them, Michael Sam.

Would you watch them on the turf? Would you watch them run a reverse?

I do not like them
On the turf.
I do not like them
Running a reverse.
I do not like them
Here or there.
I do not like them anywhere.
I do not like gay guys named Sam. I do not like them, Michael Sam.

Would you watch them from a box? Would you watch them throw a block?

Not from a box.
Not throw a block.
Not on the turf.
Not run a reverse.
I would not like them here or there. I would not like them anywhere.
I do not like gay guys named Sam. I do not like them, Michael Sam.

Would you? Could you? Watch them sack?
Watch them! Watch them! Give a smack!

I would not, could not, watch them sack.
I would not watch them give a smack

You may like them. You will see. You may like them running free.

I would not like them running free.
You let me be!
I do not like them making sacks.
I do not like them giving smacks.
I do not like them on the turf.
I do not like them running a reverse.
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them anywhere. I do not like gay guys named Sam.

Would you watch them from a box?
Would you watch them throw a block?

I would not watch them from a box.
I would not watch them throw a block.
I would not watch them here or there.
I would not watch them anywhere.
I would not watch gay guys named Sam.
I would not watch them, Michael Sam.

You may like them.
You will see.
You may like them on your team.

I would not, could not on my team.
Itís not as easy as it seems.

You do not like gay guys named Sam?

I do not like them, Michael Sam.

You do not like them, SO you say.
Watch them, watch them and you may.
Watch them and you may I say.

Michael Sam!
If you will let me be, I will watch them.
You will see.

Say! I like gay guys named Sam!
I do! I like them, Michael Sam!

And I will watch them from a box!
And I will watch them throw a block!
And I will watch them make a sack!
And I will watch them give a smack!
And I will watch them on the turf!
And I will watch them run a reverse!
And I will watch them here or there
Say! I will watch them anywhere!

I do so like gay guys named Sam!
Thank you, thank you, Michael Sam!