I even cried during Superman when they sent him to Earth all alone.
I will make this short and simple…. I was scared. I was so scared after being diagnosed that I just held it all in for so long…. and now it’s all coming out for some reason.
I was scared I was going to die.
I was scared my kids would have no mother…
John would have no wife…
and my parents no daughter.
Now that I am feeling better all these emotions are just taking over. I think I’m just so over joyed that I am feeling better, and I am truly so grateful. Everyday I promise not to take a single moment for granted. To love my family and friends and show them in anyway possible.
I can’t begin to express the fear I had. I had so many thoughts that just took over on a daily basis.
After the fear settled in a bit I decided that I would do anything and everything to stay here on Earth as long as possible to be with the ones I love. Surgery…. chemo… whatever else they threw at me. I’d do it. All of of it.
I realized quickly that I wasn’t done here…I wasn’t even close to being done here. I had so much left to do…. so much more to say.
Maybe I was more sensitive today because it was John and I’s
11th wedding anniversary. I looked at him so many times today and was just brought to tears. What hell we have been through, and now we can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. He is a good man, and I am so lucky he’s mine:) He is my soul mate:) I truly believe God knew I would need him to get me through this, and brought us together.
After everything our little family has been through… it was time to celebrate with the kids. There were so many things I missed, I just wanted to start making up for that. Making new memories:) So, we are planning a weekend trip to Chicago. Just family fun time… laughing and joking and smiling and maybe even a few tears… of joy of course:) We need this time to be together and just be grateful God has given us more time with one another.
I will say this a million times over to anyone that will listen….
Nothing in life is a guarantee. One moment… one phone call… one second….can change your life forever. Tell the ones you love just how much they mean to you every single day!
Its now 2:30am… time to get some sleep:) love you all